How to make someone love you
- Lock them in your closet, and tell yourself; "they
want to be here, they just don't realize it yet"
- Negotiate an acceptable exchange price
- Create your own religion where everyone loves you and
convert them
- Annoy them enough about it so that they have no choice
- Help them do something they want to do, but cannot, or
would not without your help
- Kill everyone else
- Talk to them in French
- Set their house on fire and heroically save them
- Make yourself irresistible
- Buy them a puppy
- Imitate and practice doing everything they do exactly the
same, tell them you're a match made in heaven
- Run up and grasp them fervently whenever you see them
- Run up and grasp someone else whenever you see them to
make them jealous
- Conquer a small country in their name
- Take them in your arms and live happily ever after